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As I sat down, with my phone in both palms, alert. My heart feels heavy, my throat feels blocked, my breath... Long breaths. I'm uneasy. I'm sad. I'm alone. I feel depressed. My eyes aren't watery but they are cloudy, tears can rain at any moment.
But if anyone should budge in now, I'll smile, maybe even laugh and share a joke. It wouldn't change what's going on in the inside of me though but it will keep mockers away, it will keep mouths shut and benevolently even make someone else feel better.

I have struggles, you have battles, we all fighting a war that has been waged on us by the realities of life.

As children, we were happy, innocent and free. Free to dream dreams, free to define our lives and how the future must be. We never for once thought it will be hard, rough, bumpy, narrow, uneasy!

We fell on our beds and slept immediately because we had nothing and no one to think about. We were in a hurry to dream our dreams of the future away on our pillows. Life was good no matter where we'd been born.
As children, we couldn't see the difference between rich and poor because we felt and believed we had it all.

Growing up, our child scales fell off our eyes. We began to see the real world as it actually is. Our minds were forced to come out of their child shells into the light of the real life. It was difficult!

They stopped carrying us on their backs, they stopped sleeping with us when we were afraid; "you're grown up now" is what they'd say.
We felt happy to be growing up, it felt good to be allowed some more freedom but the responsibilities they came with, we're overwhelming, sometimes, we'd wish we could find a way to run away from it.

Were we prepared for this? I'd say a big no! We weren't told!
They told us we could dream dreams, we could make the future however we wanted it to be.
They told us we can be anything at all, we could change the world.
But they didn't tell us it will be difficult, they didn't tell us even they themselves will turn against us, they didn't tell us that we will have to fight our battles by ourselves, alone!

They made us watch the other people with 'white' skin and plenty, long, straight hairs, with their blue and green eyes. They made us sing like them, they wanted to turn us into them by imbibing their ways in us.

Those people are so free, they can speak and express themselves how they want to but we? No! Not after we've grown up...
If you speak your mind, you're too known
If you resist intimidation, you're proud, arrogant...
Once when we were children and we did that, they said we were smart and intelligent. What contradictions!

The very things we were made to believe and believe in, are being taken away from us.
Yet, they didn't think a time will come when we'll want to run away and escape it all... the pressure reality brought to us and the truths we learned about the lies we were told.

But hey, fellow fighters, or you'd prefer to be called warriors? We don't have to give up, we don't have to lift up our hands, bend down on our knees and surrender, no! Unless you're asking God to take control, which we should do, you don't have to surrender to anything or body. We're warriors and warriors don't give up, we fight till we win. We will keep our head above waters and swim to shore, no matter how hard it may be or how long it may take.

We'll turn the ropes into tools to pull down our dreams from the skies, we'll turn the knifes into weapons to work in our favour, killing every negativity with it. We'll make challenges drink the poisons, struggles will give to us.
We will wage war on life and the world, go into battle and conquer it. We will survive and win over depression that life will shoot at us, shouting "odeeshie" whiles beating our chests


  1. Lol same people who encourage you to grow are intimidated by how much you have grown. Contradiction indeed!šŸ‘Œ


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